From Shadows to Light: Hidden Sin and Repentance in the Christian Life

The Hidden Cost of Secret Sin

Let me share a tragic story. I share this story not to shock anyone, but to show how hidden sin can cause deep and lasting harm. Marcus was alone, depressed and vulnerable. A close relative, a respected counselor in the community, began comforting him by patting him on the back, hugging him quickly, and suggesting they hang out together by going camping.

But then one day, he went further than that. Afraid and not knowing what to do, Marcus told no one. His depression and grief deepened and seeing no way out, one day he decided he no longer wanted to live. Stories like this are deeply disturbing but they remind us that hidden sins require repentance. No matter how small or large they can grow in ways we never expect.

How Secret Sins Grow in the Shadows

Hidden sin is not unusual. Maybe ours is something relatively innocent. Like a diabetic who sneaks candy bars. But maybe it's something much worse. Secret sins don't stay secret. Sin has a way of being made known. It affects our lives sometimes without us knowing it. Especially for people who have deeply held convictions about God. For those people the inconsistency in their lives, the "good Christian" the world sees vs the failing Christian of their secret life creates a devastating conflict, both for themselves and others.

"Secret sins don’t stay secret. Sin has a way of being made known, affecting our lives sometimes without us even realizing it."

God’s Light Exposes Every Darkness

As Christians we know God sees everything. There is no such thing as a secret kept from God. There is no darkness dark enough to hide the light He shines on our sin. According to Luke 12:2,

"For there is nothing covered up that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known."

Lessons from the First Hidden Sins

From Jesus’ words we can look back to the very first attempt to hide from God. Like Adam and Eve (Genesis 3:8-10) who tried to hide from God among the trees in the Garden of Eden, there is no running from God. When He calls to Adam, Adam tells God he was "afraid."

What a sad word. Never before had Adam had to fear His loving Father. But now, with Adam's new knowledge, he realized what he had done and, oh, what a price he paid. David also also experienced the consequences of his hidden sin.

In Psalm 32:3-4 David describes what it was like for him when he would not confess his sins of adultery and murder. He says his body wasted away and he groaned all day. He literally felt the weight of his unconfessed sins in his physical body. He continues to say that God's hand of discipline was heavy on him and he had no strength. If we are God's and we sin, the weight of that unconfessed sin will be ever present to us, one way or another. Some people, in their lack of faith, convince themselves that God can't see what they are doing (Psalm 10:11).

The Dangers of Rationalizing and Blaming

We rationalize sin in so many ways. "Well I deserve happiness," says someone in the midst of adultery. "I am in love with him or her so sex is beautiful and not sinful," says another who is engaged in sex outside of marriage. "Lying on my taxes doesn't hurt anyone and no one will ever know." There are a multitude of ways we excuse sin.

Sin always does one thing though. It places yourself above God. It is a matter of pride. My needs, we think, are more important than obeying God. And how convenient it is for us when we can put blame on another person.

If we go all the way back to Adam we see him blaming someone else for his sin. According to Adam it was all Eve's fault. How often do we do the same thing? Well I wouldn't have gotten so angry if this person hadn't said that thing to me. I wouldn't have looked at porn if my buddy hadn't shown me that website. If my wife would be more loving I wouldn't have looked elsewhere. We have to learn to accept responsibility for our own choices.

We tell ourselves these lies because deep down we believe our way is better than God’s, but Scripture gives us the sobering truth,

"There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death." Proverbs 14:12

What "right way" have you chosen in your life that you have now come to deeply regret?

God Will Judge the Secrets of the Heart

In Hebrews 4:13, however, we are told that all things are exposed to God and we must give an account to Him for everything we do. Paul explains in Romans 2:16 that, "God will judge the secrets of men by Jesus Christ." Not only does God see the secret things that we do but they are judged by Him.

Even in this life, if we feel we never "got caught" or had to answer for what we did there will still come a time of just and righteous judgment. Paul talks about this again in 2 Corinthians 5:10,

"For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive the things done in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad."

The judgment seat of Christ is where Christians will be evaluated by Jesus Himself to determine our rewards. What have we done and why? Was it good or bad? What have we failed to do that God would have had us do?

Hidden Sin Blocks Prayer and Prosperity

Isaiah 59:2 describes an even more frightening effect of hidden sin. Here Isaiah tells us that our "sins have hidden His face so He does not hear." Do you want God to hear your prayers? If so, if you have hidden sin, you must repent and turn from it. But what if we have sin that we are not aware of?

Psalm 19:12 reminds us that we need God to reveal to us our hidden sin. Sin can be buried so deeply and we can become so comfortable with it, we forget that it's even there. We have rationalized and made excuses for our sin for so long that it doesn't feel like sin anymore.

But Proverbs 28:13 puts it very plainly. We can't prosper in the midst of sin but if we confess them and repent the Lord will have mercy on us, just as he did on David when he confessed his hidden sins (Psalm 32:5). The word prosper in Hebrew means to push forward or succeed.

This success isn't just monetary it is spiritual. How can we succeed in our life if we remain in sin? Either we will be found out and there will be terrible repercussions in this life or most certainly there will be in the life to come. These warnings are not given to condemn us but to lead us to the One who can restore us.

Hidden Sin: Confession, Mercy, and Humble Repentance

In Psalm 25:4-18, David tells us what we should do. In this Psalm, David asks God to "show me", "teach me", and "lead me" in His paths. David asks God to forget his sins and transgressions and have mercy on Him. David says that God guides and teaches the humble. Fear of the Lord brings prosperity. "Forgive my sins," he cries.

David never forgot the lessons he learned from his hidden sins. He never forgot, or took for granted, the mercy of the Lord from that day. As Scripture reminds us, "There is no difference all have sinned" (Romans 3:23). We all need the mercy of God. David’s plea for mercy echoes through the ages, and the same spirit of humble repentance is heard in the words of an old hymn.

In 1868, the great hymn writer Fanny Cosby, wrote a hymn, "Pass Me Not O Gentle Savior." The words seem so fitting when thinking about our deepest sins.

Pass me not, O gentle Savior,

hear my humble cry;

While on others Thou art calling,

do not pass me by.

Refrain:

Savior, Savior, hear my humble cry;

while on others Thou art calling,

do not pass me by.

Let me at a throne of mercy

find a sweet relief,

kneeling there in deep contrition;

help my unbelief. [Refrain]

Trusting only in Thy merit,

Would I seek Thy face;

heal my wounded, broken spirit,

save me by Thy grace. [Refrain]

Thou, the Spring of all my comfort,

more than life to me;

Whom have I on earth beside Thee?

Whom in heav'n but Thee? [Refrain]

Is God more than life to you? Who is there on earth more important than Him? Each of us can choose to move from sin's slave to Christ's servant. All of us should ask God to help our unbelief, because in our unbelief lies terrible moments where our secret sins rise up to claim us. Instead, we claim Jesus, healer of our broken spirit, the One who hears our humble cry and saves.