When Human Love Fails: Discovering the Love That Surpasses Knowledge

When Human Love Fails Us

We can probably remember many times when love has failed us. From parents who weren't very good at showing love, to first loves that didn't last, to failed marriages that should have been forever. The Bible tells us that God's love never fails us (1 Corinthians 13:8). Scripture says we are to know God's love. But it doesn't mean know like, "I know it's raining outside." It means know deep in your bones, in your soul—something experienced, something living in you—because it quite literally does.

We may try to find love through social media likes and hearts. But no matter how many we receive, we know deep down that the person on the other end does not truly know us. They might not even like us if they did. But there is a love that is available to us that surpasses knowledge, one that can only be known through experience.

Fully Known and Truly Loved

To quote author and pastor Timothy Keller,

"To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God."

Our spouse may love us but never really know us. Not true of God. Our spouse may learn to truly know us and then decide they don't love us. But God—oh, what a God He is! He knows our worst and He knows our best and He loves us still.

But Divine love is not like ours. It begins with something deeper—He knows us completely. And because He knows us so completely—from our first breath to our last thought—Scripture shows us just how deep that knowing goes.

Known Completely—Even the Worst of Us

God told the Prophet Jeremiah, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." (Jeremiah 1:5). Just as God knew Jeremiah before he was born and had a plan for his life, so He does for ours.

God tells Jeremiah, "I knew you." And indeed He knows us completely like no other. He knows the number of hairs on our head (Luke 12:7). He knows the number of years we will breathe on this earth. He knows the good works He has called us to.

Ezekiel 11:5 tells us that God knows the "things that come into your mind; every one of them." We cannot be more known than that. But in spite of knowing not just the good but all of the bad, He still loves us. Would we love our spouses if we knew everything they ever thought? God's love is incomprehensible to us because it is so much more than our own.

When we know His love, it is only the outskirts of it—like knowing New York City from a small suburb 50 miles away where on a clear day you can make out the skyline. To be known this completely should unsettle us because we know what is actually within us. Yet here is the astonishing grace: even with full knowledge of our hidden darkness, God does not turn away He actually draws near in love.

Loved While We Were Still Sinners

The truth is that Jesus loved us so much while we were still sinners, He died for us (Romans 5:8). When we were slaves to sin He loved us. When we had no thought of Him He loved us. And even this was not a reaction to our sin, as though God adjusted His plan after we failed.

In fact, in Revelation 13:8 we are told that Jesus is the Lamb slain before the foundation of the world. God knew we would sin before He ever created any of us. But He had a perfect plan born out of love. He would send us His own Son as a perfect sacrifice for the world. This eternal love is so immense that what we see now is only a faint hint of its true depth

Grasping the Love That Surpasses Knowledge

This reminds me of a beautiful verse: "Behold, these are but the outskirts of His ways, and how small a whisper do we hear of Him" (Job 26:14). We hear a small whisper, see a small glimpse, feel a small touch, and understand His love accordingly. Yet Scripture does not leave us with the conclusion that God’s love is simply beyond us and unknowable.

In Ephesians chapter 3 Paul prays a heartfelt prayer for the believers of Ephesus. He prays that they, together with all of God's people, be "rooted and grounded in love" and that they could grasp or comprehend the true extent of God's love for them. He wants them to "know this love that surpasses knowledge" so they may be "filled with the fullness of God."

Knowing God's love is knowing the nature of God. The more we understand God the more we will be filled by Him and His love. This love will spill out, as it was always intended to, and be lavished on all those we come in contact with.

But what does it mean to "know this love that surpasses knowledge"? We may know something is a fact but still not know it in our hearts. We may know that our parents love us because they clothed us, fed us, and protected us but we have never experienced the tenderness, the deep emotional connection that goes beyond simple knowledge.

Many people know God loves them. They have been told this since they were babies. They know in their head that He sent His Son to die for them, but what they know is only in their head. The reality of God's love has never sunk deeper than if it were a fact like 2 + 2 = 4. Paul, however, doesn't leave us with mere facts, he describes God's love in vivid ways that he himself lived every day.

The Breadth, Length, Height, and Depth

Paul speaks of the breadth, length, height, and depth of His love. Paul uses this language because for him God's love is not just facts, but what He experienced every day He lived. The breadth of His love is the whole world and all who are in it, the length of His love "endures from everlasting to everlasting" (Psalm 103, 136), the height of His love reaches to Heaven, and the depth of His love reaches down into the mire of sin to pull out those who call on Him.

At the very beginning of Paul's prayer he is on his knees pleading that they would be strengthened with the might of the Holy Spirit and that Christ would live in their hearts. Without Christ in our hearts there is no possibility of comprehending God's love for us. Experiencing Christ dwelling in us should bring us ultimate satisfaction. And because this love is so deep and enduring, God promises to carry it with us through every season of life, no matter how long or hard the road.

A Love That Never Ends and Never Lets Go

In Isaiah 46:4 God declares, "Even to your old age and gray hairs I am He, I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you." Young or old God's love sustains us. He sustains us with the very same love He has for His own Son.

Loved as the Father Loves the Son—Now Go Share It

When Jesus prays for us in John 17, he says this to the Father,

"I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me" (John 17:23).

Can you actually begin to understand His love? That He loves us as much as He loves His Son? If this is true—if we are loved in this way—then it demands something from us: to love others as we've been loved. Our love must be a love in action.

We have no greater need than to be loved and that is why God offers us His perfect, everlasting love and gives it to us to dwell in our hearts so we can share Him with others. It is not given to us to hoard, keep to ourselves, or as "our little secret." God's all-knowing love is given to us to share with others so that the fellowship we have with God can be known by all who call on Him.

As we close, let's let the words of this beloved old hymn, "Make Me a Blessing," become our prayer.

Give as 'twas given to you in your need,

Love as the Master loved you;

Be to the helpless a helper indeed,

Unto your mission be true.

Refrain:

Make me a blessing, Make me a blessing.

Out of my life may Jesus shine;

Make me a blessing, O Savior, I pray.

Make me a blessing to someone today.

God's love is the love that surpasses knowledge.

May it be so, Lord—today and every day.

Amen